To look homeless here is to NOT look homeless.

I wrote so much on my homeless journey, but even with the 100+ handwritten pages, I feel like I just scratched the surface of simply understanding the difficulties of it.  I don’t have a clue what it’s like to really be homeless, yet learned enough to know it’s horrific.

Every homeless person I’ve met or talked to has a different story, yet most of our working class sees homelessness as a place they’ll never be.  ‘Those people’ have addictions, they’re lazy or have some other type of dysfunction.  No matter what their situation, they’re prejudged by many as being a drain on our society.

When asking for assistance, I never said I was homeless because (a) I didn’t know what would happen and (b) it’s somewhat embarrassing.  In suburbia, to look homeless is to not look homeless.  I looked and dressed like I always do, yet I didn’t have access to the same hygiene routines.   Continue reading

are you sucktastic? [day 240]

I seem to be self-motivated by imposing challenges on myself, ones to better my artistic ability, to make positive changes or to just do something I feel is worthwhile.  Sometimes we get so bogged down with life that we don’t make time for the really important stuff.  A friend of mine has been struggling with not making time to be artistic, afraid that if she creates something, it will be “sucktastic”.  Okay, I love the word, but I hate what it means here.  Half of the crazy art I make is sucktastic, but it comes from my heart so it still has meaning for me.  I might not ever post my sucktastic art, but the artistic expression used during the making of it is a much needed emotional release.

Sometimes we have to be sucktastic before achieving fantastic.  I was listening to a talk radio show about success and failure in our school system.  They spoke about a pendulum, with success and failure on each swing.  The pendulum theory, as I like to call it, basically means that you’re allowed to succeed as much as you’re allowed to fail.  I have had many failures in all areas of my life, and sometimes it’s hard to get back up, brush yourself off and try again.  Allowing for big time failure can bring big time success, the sky being the limit.  If you allow for a little failure, you can achieve a little success.  This often feels like being in a box or being grounded, and sometimes we don’t even realize we’re in this position.  And the worst case scenario in this theory?  Non-movement or no room for failure.  This creates a vast black hole of nothingness.  Sometimes this is us being paralyzed with fear, sometimes it’s lack of motivation, but the important thing is identifying your issue and finding a way to move past it.

What does all of this have to do with Trash Society?  A lot.  Sometimes I loose sight of why I’m doing any of this.  Is it really making a difference?  I’m not in this for the money, obviously, as if I were to place a financial statement on it, it would be in the red.  I could use my blogging time to do freelance work.  I have a passion for what I’m doing, but I do sometimes lose sight of it.  Trash society is to make a difference, hopefully in less waste.  If you apply the pendulum theory to you and your talent, and if you’re not allowing yourself failure, then your talents are being wasted.  Where are you on the pendulum swing?